How can I miss you

Information about How can I miss you

Published on December 24, 2007

Author: Funtoon

Source: authorstream.com

Content

Welcome to UC Davis:  Welcome to UC Davis How Can I Miss You If You Won’t Go Away:  How Can I Miss You If You Won’t Go Away Emil Rodolfa, Ph.D., Director Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS) [email protected] What are we going to discuss?:  What are we going to discuss? CAPS and other resources College Student Mental Health Transitions Time for questions and comments College student mental health is more than a professional issue:  College student mental health is more than a professional issue Who Is Here?:  Who Is Here? Northern, Central, Southern California Out of State Out of the Country First Child Off to College (2nd, 3rd, 4th) Last Child Off to College Sad to see your child go Excited to see your child go Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS):  Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS) Location Staffing Eligibility for Service Counseling Services Confidentiality Consultation The House Contacting CAPS www.caps.ucdavis.edu 530-752-0871 then “0” A Caring Environment for Students:  A Caring Environment for Students A Team Approach To Respond to Student Mental Health Needs :  A Team Approach To Respond to Student Mental Health Needs This Transition:  This Transition How are you feeling? How is your child feeling? A Contributor to our Feelings: We Were Young Once:  A Contributor to our Feelings: We Were Young Once College Student Challenges:  College Student Challenges Three Basic Questions Who am I? Who will I be with? What am I going to do? College Student Challenges:  College Student Challenges Three Basic Activities Study Sleep Socialize A Model of Student Distress:  A Model of Student Distress Personal Factors School Factors Stress Attempt to Cope (unsuccessful) Distress Intervention Graduate School Challenges:  Graduate School Challenges College Student Mental Health: ACHA 2004 Data :  College Student Mental Health: ACHA 2004 Data Top 10 Health Impediment to Academic Performance 32.4% Stress 25.6% Cold/flu 24.6% Sleep 18.1% Concern for troubled friend 15.9% Relationship 15.3% Depression/Anxiety 13.4% Internet use/Computer games 8.6% Death of family/friend 8.5% Sinus/Ear Infection 7.6% Alcohol use Slide18:  SELF ENVIRONMENT FUTURE Cognitive Triad = Negative/Distorted Feelings • about self • about environment • about the future Family Relationships:  Family Relationships Influence student feelings and behavior Slide20:  Expectations Saying Goodbye:  Saying Goodbye Individuation/Separation:  Individuation/Separation Motivation:  Motivation Transitioning to UC Davis: The Beginning:  Transitioning to UC Davis: The Beginning Issues Navigate a new environment Develop a new social group Separate from friends Cope with feelings of anonymity Adapt to different academic expectations and standards Suggestions Have contact Be a good listener-what do they want from you Provide reassurance Note common experiences Encourage to use resources Keep fit, sleep, eat, use the ARC Transitioning to UC Davis: Settle In:  Transitioning to UC Davis: Settle In Issues Homesickness may intensify = disconnect from UC Davis Disenchantment with UC Davis “Small fish in a big pond” Worry about family problems Academic reality sets in Conflicts Choosing a major Suggestions Pay a visit, bring a treat, take them out to eat Reassure them that their feelings are normal Balance responsibilities and life Use student services/CAPS Help them manage time Be supportive-don’t try to fix it Convey confidence in their ability Transitioning To UC Davis: Ending the Quarter:  Transitioning To UC Davis: Ending the Quarter Issues Coping with academic and other stress Manage feelings about the holidays Study for finals; complete term papers Separation from new friends Suggestions Encourage them to discuss experiences Encourage self-care Discuss holiday plans Familiarity with home Joie’s Tips: As Your Kids Leave For School:  Joie’s Tips: As Your Kids Leave For School 1.Three types of parents: 1) parents who obsess and try to help too much; 2) parents who can’t wait to see their kids go; 3) and ones in the middle-helpful but giving them independence….that is what your kid wants 2.Don’t pat your kids on the head as you leave 3.Just because they are adults, don’t cut them off financially-realize the world will kick them in the butt with competing demands 4.Don’t fight your kids battles-let them deal with their problems rather than fighting their battles for them 5.Just be accepting of your kids….support them; be flexible 6.Your kid will be busy with all the demands they will experience: If you don’t hear from them for a period of time, things are probably ok and they are just busy. (Maybe a brief call would help) 7.Even though your kid doesn’t live at home don’t open their mail without permission Joie’s Tips: As They Return From School:  Joie’s Tips: As They Return From School 1.Don’t boss your kids around when they come home because the more you boss them around when they are home the less they will want to come home. 2.Your kids are going to see themselves differently so you are going to need to see them differently too. 3.Don’t get your feelings hurt when they come home and spend time with their friends rather than with you 4.They are living in a new world and may see their new world as home rather than their childhood home 5.Don’t change their room or use it for storage when they are home. Transitions are Important:  Transitions are Important In Summary: A Couple of Tips:  In Summary: A Couple of Tips a. Encourage them to take responsibility – b. Assess when to get involved to handle any problems c. Keep in touch…not too much…not too little d. Remember they are going through the same and different things you are going through e. Be careful about drastic changes f. Understand reality: theirs and yours g. If they are talking about problems understand what they are asking for (if anything). h. What do you want them to know: you love them, you will be there for them, you will give them room to grow… i. Give them roots and give them wings….now is a time for both! Your Dream and Our Goal:  Your Dream and Our Goal CAPS is here to help your children have a terrific experience at UC Davis while gaining knowledge about themselves, their relationships and their future goals… Thanks for Listening:  Thanks for Listening Questions Comments Issues Concerns

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